I used to be a planner.
My days and months were planned years ahead. I had lists of the lists of the things I needed to do.
Yet, with my attention focused on making all those lists and plans, I didn’t realise that life itself was passing me by. Insidiously, plans and lists dominated my life. So stealthily I didn't notice it happening, my days lost their balance in the clamouring demands of everything that needed to get done.
Since my husband’s diagnosis, treatment, surgery and now (thanks be to God) his slow recovery, I’ve learnt that one is most alive when plans must be changed in an instant and there’s no time to make lists.
Life these past seven months has consisted of focusing only on this moment, this day. No time to worry about yesterday’s mistakes. No time to stress about planning for tomorrow’s tasks. No time to think, just to be in the moment and deal with whatever happens.
|Living in the present moment |
allows us to be open to whatever experience comes our way
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©iStock.com/"Life Crossword Puzzle" by kaan tanman
Sometimes it takes a terrifying crisis to make us understand on a deep spiritual level that this moment of existence is all we really have. In spontaneaously living through the crisis, we learn how to differentiate between what's essential to our happiness, and what is ultimately superfluous.
And how enlightening that discovery has been.
Dear Judy - thank you for the update - I often wonder what is happening - so it's always good to hear.
You're so right life can't be planned, we need to focus on the here and now ... and that bandwagon rolls on daily with the need to be with one's beloved, or as in my case with my mother, and then her brother-in-law ... who also came into my ambit.
I am so happy to read that Beric is improving ... and that you are both able to adjust to being happy together without the fluff around.
So pleased to hear from you and thanks for the links - they were excellent posts ... with thoughts and big hugs - Hilary
Dear Hilary - thanks for your (as always!) kind words! And yes, all is going well here although Beric still gets very tired so he's only on half day but being very sensible and not pushing himself too fast. Enjoy the week ahead and take care! Love and hugs Judy xxxx
I'm glad your sweetie is on the mend. As my hubby says, life is too short to be small. Throw the damn plans out the window and LIVE!
Judy, I have been scarce in the blogging world and, notably, in responding to events in your life. I am glad
there has been positive progress, but regret not having been supportive toward you. My own life has been swallowed by successive challenges. My health ones you already know; my husband's, serious as well. Maybe some day I will be able to write you a lengthy email. For now, just know I wish you well.
BISH: your hubby is correct! Life is far too short to be small (or scared) - there's only enough time for life to be lived! Sending big hugs your way and hope life is showering you with abundance!
JUDY - ahh, Judy - no regrets; I too have been so focused on getting through each day as best we can (my beloved Mom had a major heart attack a week before my husband's surgery - both, thanks be to God, are now recovering well), at least I am so blessed with good health whereas your own challenges make your husband's ill health that much harder to deal with. A few days ago we watched an excellent DVD on Jacqueline du Pre, the brilliant celloist who, at 29, was struck with MS. You've been in my thoughts since, but did nothing about it. To get your comment today was an amazing connection. I've read your poems on your blog - stark , beautiful, pognant - I hope you'll publish them one day as inspiration & encouragement to others with MS. Sending much love and light to you, and to your husband as well ... may you both find the strength to find the small & big joys in every day. Stay well in spirit & body, my friend xx
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